4dpt

It's now day 4 of the wait with a week more to go. I've been trying to stay busy and not think about it. Not hope about it. Not give up hope on it. Most of all, just get through the time as quickly as possible but everytime i look up at the clock it is only 5 minutes after the last time i looked at the clock!

I've started watching out for symptoms... Am i feeling nauseous or am i just hungry. Is that spotting or just nothing.

I've tried to stop Googling everything from "slow blastocyst" to "ivf rates" to "provera" (which Doc D said we'd use next time). I need to stay off the internet. But in the absence of things to do, what else can i do?

I've also started nervously nibbling on things all day. i can't stop. i'll have gained kilos by the end of this! not good! not good at all!

G, who started this week with so much promise, making me lunch, cleaning things up before i could worry about it, has slacked off big time and it's back to me making the meals, cleaning, picking things up. He's still good but nowhere near the intensity as Sunday and Monday. Sigh...

I would like to spend the day in bed watching television because at least then i'm entertained and "busy" and not thinking about it.